Body Swap: Girls and Boys
by pinkcat4569
Summary: The team is switching bodies again, this time Connor, Abby, and Becker, Jess wake to a shocking surprise. Sequel to Body Swap: Matt and Lester.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Body Swap: Girls and Boys, Chapter One

Author: Pinkcat4569

Rating: T for now. May go into Adult, don't know yet.

Spoilers: Seasons 4, 5.

Description: The team is switching bodies again, this time Connor, Abby, and Becker, Jess wake to a shocking surprise.

Disclaimer: I don't own Primeval or the characters. This is just for fun.

Author's note: Thanks for all the reviews and comments. I thought about having the Lesters and Matt/Emily switch, but decided to just concentrate on these two couples. This story starts off in the middle of the action, so you may want to read the story this is sequel to: Body Swap: Matt and Lester.

Update: Edited for spelling and some grammar. I like to use fragmented sentences to resemble real speech. I know it's not quite correct.

Chapter One, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

"What are we going to do?" asked Jess, in Becker's body. She was startled by the deep voice that came out of her. "Whoa, that's strange," she said, "and not nearly as sexy."

Becker stared at her, or that is, him, his body. "This is a nightmare," he said, cringing at the high, girly voice he heard as he spoke. "Why does this keep happening?"

Connor, in Abby's body, shrugged. "Don't know. Very weird. I feel short."

"You are short, Connor," said Abby, in his body. "This isn't happening; we're all just having a really bad dream. Maybe we got some bad alcohol or something."

"We weren't drinking," said Connor.

"I was," said Becker, "but it's worn off. I know I'm not hallucinating, damn it."

"We didn't spend the evening all together, either," said Jess, towering over them in her new tall body.

"Some of it," said Abby, "Once Conn and I arrived at the Opera to join you and the others."

Jess gasped. "Matt, Emily, and the Lesters," said Jess, her eyes widening. "You don't suppose..."

They all got her shocked expression.

"Where's my phone!" yelled Abby, tripping over Connor's feet. "Connor, you have no coordination!"

"I do so. You just don't know how to work my body."

"Yeah, do you have an owner's manual?" she asked, with a grin.

"How can you make jokes? We're in chick bodies!"

"Don't call me a chick, Becker!" cried Jess.

Abby picked herself up. "Calm down. Let's see how the others are," she said, managing to find her phone. "Lester's not answering. I'll try Matt next."

Connor went in the bathroom, leaving Jess and Becker alone. Jess sat on the sofa, not knowing what to say or do. She began to cry.

Becker sat beside her. "Hey," he said, with her gentle, sensitive voice. He laid a delicate hand on his shoulder. "Connor's getting to be a pro in switching bodies back. He'll figure this out too."

She nodded, still sobbing. "It's...just...so weird."

He laughed, and instead of his deep chuckles, Jess' cheerful giggles came out. "Yes, it is. Very strange."

Becker put her arm around his body, but couldn't reach all the way around.

"I didn't realize my shoulders were so broad," he said.

Jess managed a chuckle. "I'm not used to being so big and tall." She had to bend down and scrunch her new body to fit into the embrace of her old one.

"Boy, you are tiny," he said. "Not that it's bad. To be honest, I always liked that." He chuckled. "I liked having excuses to hold you."

"Oh, excuses like a prehistoric creature wanting to eat us, or future beetles taking over the ARC and sending me into allergic shock?" she asked with a teasing tone.

"Yeah, like those," he said.

She laughed. "I always felt safe, like you had me wrapped in a cocoon. I guess now, I get to do the wrapping." Jess held Becker, now small and delicate, in her new muscle laden body. "OK, so this isn't so bad."

He chuckled. "Talk about experiencing life in someone else's shoes."

She laughed. "Yeah," she said. "Thank you, Becker. I think I'm over the panic now."

He smiled. "Not easy to do when your body is staring at you."

She smiled, pulling slightly out of the hug, but staying close to him.

Connor came out of the bathroom, looking kind of sheepish. "I have a truly beautiful woman," said Connor.

"What were you doing in there?" asked Becker.

"Don't answer! I don't want to know!" cried Jess.

Connor smirked, making Abby's face look odd with his mischievous grin.

Abby finally reached Matt, who was pretty grumpy. "Do you know what time it is Connor?"

"Yes, I do, and I'm not Connor."

"What? This better be a joke. Don't tell me you and Becker switched again."

"Sorry, Matt. In fact, we have, but not just with each other. Becker switched with Jess, and Connor and I switched."

Pause.

"Abby?"

"Yep."

"Oh my God!"

"So I take it you're still you?"

"Yeah. Emily is herself too."

"Wonderful," she said sarcastically.

Matt chuckled. "So...what are you going to do?"

Abby sighed. "We haven't got passed the panic yet."

He chuckled again. "Well, we've managed to change everyone back so far, just hang in there. In the morning we'll try to switch you again."

"OK. Morning, that's a long ways away."

"I know. Sorry, Abby."

"Yeah," she said, and hung up. "They're OK."

"Typical," said Connor, crossing Abby's arms in front of him. "I'm getting sick of looking at myself."

Becker smirked. "Now you know how we all feel."

Connor glared, but wore Abby's grin. "Funny."

"He wants us to wait till morning? We can't stay like this!" cried Jess. "I can't sleep in a man's body!"

Abby smiled Connor's goofy grin. "Even if it's that man's?" she asked, gesturing at Becker.

"Stop it," Jess said, blushing. Becker just smiled.

Connor shrugged. "At least we're both couples. It would be really embarrassing if we weren't. At least I've seen this body 'au naturel."

Abby laughed and nodded. She noticed Jess and Becker had gone pink. "It's OK, you two. We know what you were doing in her room."

Connor laughed.

Jess and Becker turned red. "But we weren't!" cried Jess.

Becker nodded, and said. "It was late, and I was a little smashed, so Jess wouldn't let me drive home. I slept on the floor."

"Honestly!" cried Jess, putting Becker's hands on his hips. "Really, you think I'd sleep with someone so soon?"

Connor chuckled, and Abby apologized for them both.

"So I guess it is a bit embarrassing for you then," said Connor.

"A bit," said Becker. He looked at Jess, who was still red. "No offense, Jess, but I like you better in your own body."

Jess chuckled, relieving some stress. "I'm glad to hear that, thank you."

Connor yawned. "OK, well, I'm off to bed."

Abby nodded, and followed.

"They're not freaked out, like we are," said Jess.

"No. It's kind of a scary thought, seeing so much strange stuff that it doesn't shock you anymore," said Becker.

"Well it shocks me," she said, frowning and jerking her head.

Becker had to laugh; her animated expressions looked odd on his face. "Look, they're right. Tomorrow we'll switch back, until then, let's try to sleep."

"OK," said Jess. "I'll take the couch."

"Why?"

"Because I'm in the butch, he-man body. You need your, uh, my...beauty rest."

Becker laughed. "It's your bed, and you're still you. There's no way I'm letting you give up your bed."

She smiled. "We'll share."

Becker cocked Jess' eyebrow, which made her giggle. "Share?"

"Yes, but just sleeping. And don't get curious about my body. You're not allowed to go looking underneath my clothes, or feel around," she said, blushing.

He laughed. "Ditto, Jess."

She giggled. They went back to her room, and crawled into bed. They just laid there.

"Becker?"

"Yeah?"

"I can't sleep, it's too weird."

"I know, plus, how the hell do you sleep in this gown? It keeps riding up."

She giggled more. "I guess you get used to it, but don't."

He smiled. 'Promise."

They laid a bit longer in quiet, until Jess rolled over toward him. "It's so weird, looking down on people."

He laughed. "Yeah, looking up at the world is strange. It makes me feel small and kind of...helpless. Do you feel like this?"

"No! Well, maybe occasionally, and sure, with this job, I get scared. But most of the time, I'm fine. I may be small, but I can stomp plenty loud, especially in my heels. So I have to stretch and jump a little, big deal. I'm good at what I do, and I think I'm a good person."

"You are, Jess. You're worth three or four of some big oafs I've met."

"Thank you, Becker."

"You're welcome," he said. Then he giggled like Jess. "I'm Jess Parker, hear me roar."

Jess laughed his deep, throaty chuckled. "Absolutely," she said, looking at him.

They stared at each other, until Becker draped her arm around her, pulling her to him. It was a bit awkward: he was used to holding her into him. Now, she dwarfed him.

"I don't mind being tiny when you hold me."

He laughed. "Yeah, I kind of miss wrapping you up in my arms."

She winked. "My turn," she said, and easily scooped her tiny body into his large arms.

They lay like that, both sighing happily.

Jess yawned. "I think I might actually fall asleep."

"Goodnight, Jess."

"Goodnight." She smiled, relaxing as she listened to him breathing. "Becker?"

"Yeah?"

"I still want my body back."

He smiled. "Me too."

She kissed him on her head, and he snuggled closer into his own chest.

They drifted off, lying happily entangled.

End of Chapter One


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: I could get pretty racy with this. I decided to keep it slightly vague, with innuendos. Let me know if you feel it's too adult.

Chapter Two, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

Becker woke up and realized he was laying on someone. Then he saw two big, hairy arms.

He was lying with a guy?

Then he felt his own body, soft and small. He remembered. He was inside Jess' body, and she was in his.

He sighed. At least it was better than what he thought at first. He moved a little bit, causing Jess to stir. She opened his eyes.

"Morning," she said. She smiled his impish grin.

He lit up. There was something about her that glowed when she smiled, even with his mouth.

"Morning," he said.

She smiled, running his hand through her long hair. They lay still for a moment. "I could get used to this," she said.

"What? No way!" he cried forcefully, alarming her.

She looked frightened and a touch annoyed. "Why?"

"Why? Jess, I think you're adorable, but I prefer your body on you! I'm sorry, but I can definitely not get used to waking up in your body."

Jess giggled, and it was strange to see his face so innocent. "You idiot! I could get used to waking up with you, not waking up in your body!"

"Oh."

She giggled harder, and made him smile.

"In that case, Jess, yes, I could get used to this too."

She smiled. "That's better."

He laughed. "I guess we should move."

She sighed. "I guess. Too bad."

"Yeah, but I want my body back. The sooner we get moving, the sooner we can push Temple to find a way to switch us back."

"Right. Let's get ready."

Becker frowned as she said that. "Get each other's bodies ready?"

They both blushed. "Yeah, this could be...awkward," she said.

"Very."

"Well, um, I guess, we could dress our own bodies, while the other keeps his, her eyes closed?" she suggested.

He stared, at her. "I don't know..."

"Or, I could just tell you what to put on, but, um...I'm not sure I want you to see me, um, without clothes on...I mean, not this way," she said with a slight grin.

"Yeah, this isn't as much fun," he said, smirking.

She laughed. "Let's get this over with. Wait, you don't have any clothes here."

"I have a spare uniform in the car."

"Good," she said. "Should we...try to shower?"

His face went white. Then he raised her eyebrow, and said, "Also not as fun this way."

She lightly slapped her arm, and said, "Becker."

He laughed. "Yeah, this is very awkward."

Finally, they decided the best idea was to get ready together. So, Becker retrieved his uniform and an emergency shaving kit with some personal items.

"Ready?" she asked. He nodded.

They went to the bathroom, and Becker closed her eyes, as she undressed her body. "This is really strange."

He laughed. "It is." He tried to remain calm. He felt her pulling the clothes off. Even though it was her body, he could feel that he was getting...excited.

Jess felt it too. She pushed him gently in the shower, and helped him lather her body. "Um...Jess, you sure you want me...touching your body?" he asked.

She sighed. "I don't want you smelling. I mean me. I mean. Ugh. Do the best you can."

"OK."

He tried not to think about the specific body parts as he ran the sponge over them. "We really should have slept together."

"Excuse me?"

He smiled, mischievously. "The night of the opera. If we had...you know, this might not be so uncomfortable today."

She watched the suds over her own body, and realized something strange was happening to his.

"It would still be this uncomfortable, believe me." She cursed. She had an idea what was going on inside his body, with the hormones and stuff but it was uncomfortable and embarrassing.

She was getting horny by watching her own body. Yuck.

"Get out," she said flatly.

Becker looked amused. "Excuse me?" he asked, with eyes still closed.

"Sorry. I...uh...Oh my god. This so wrong. I'm so embarrassed. Becker...your body is...um...happy."

He burst out laughing. "Yeah, that happens when I look at you."

"Becker!" she cried, but then she became curious. "Really?"

He chuckled. "Really. Sorry. This is so awkward."

She blushed, and relaxed. "It's OK. You make me...excited too. I'm just not used to experiencing it as a guy."

He laughed. "OK, look let's switch," he said. "We'll wrap a towel around you, uh, me, and then we'll stick you in cold water. It helps."

"Good. I don't like this."

He laughed again, and Jess wrapped a towel around her body, then slipped her robe around Becker. Then she quickly braided her long, wet hair.

"That's different," said Becker, as the hair sagged down his back.

"Never wore a braid?"

"Can't say that I have," said Becker. "Well, one body down."

Jess laughed nervously. She closed his eyes, and he undressed her. The feel of him taking off her clothes was not helping her...situation. Finally, she felt cold water over his body and he was right, it did help.

"It also helps to think of unsexy things," he said, lightly running a sponge over his body. "I usually focus on Temple."

She burst out laughing. "Thanks, that did help." She chuckled, and took a deep breath. "I think I'm alright now."

"Good. Sorry, Jess. I know this is weird."

"Very. On the plus side, we're doing this together. It's just another thing that will bring us closer."

"Yeah," he said, smiling. "Can't get much closer."

"Oh, yes we can."

"Jessica!"

She giggled. He turned off the faucet, and pulled her out, wrapping a towel around. "The rest should be easy compared to that," he said.

"Yep. Don't worry. I'll dress you in something adorable."

"Thanks Jess," he said sarcastically. "Got anything black?"

"You're so funny. No."

"How about you wear slacks today?"

"Are you kidding? No!"

"I'm sorry, but I'd rather not have guys checking me out."

She giggled. "OK, nothing too sexy."

"Or pink."

"Fine."

"Or light purple."

"It's called lavender, Becker."

"Or girly blue or that lemon yellow or wimpy green..."

"Becker, shut up!"

He smirked. He stood in the middle of her room, eyes closed, as she pulled clothes on him.

"This is pretty erotic, Jess."

"No, it isn't. Don't get me started again, please."

He laughed. "I'm so glad we kissed, or this would be unbearable."

"It would. I'm so glad you finally made a move."

"You could have."

"Excuse me? I have been! You're just too thick!"

He laughed. "When I open my eyes, I'm not going to be hit with a rainbow, am I?"

"Maybe..."

He groaned.

"OK. I look cute. Open."

He opened his eyes to see Jess had put on a sage green skirt, navy blue sweater, and a red bead necklace. "You toned it down, didn't you?"

"A little, but I'm still adorable."

"Yes, you are. Thank you, Jess."

She giggled, and leaned down to kiss him. Instead of his normal thick, full lips, she was greeted with soft, delicate lips. 'I'm kissing my own mouth!' she thought.

She broke off. "That's just weird."

"I know. I like kissing softer lips," he said, smiling.

She beamed, and blushed. "Now, for the hair and makeup."

"Makeup? No way!"

"Becker, it's my face. I need to be suitably done up."

Becker cursed, and sat still as she put on eye shadow, liner and mascara.

"Ow!"

"Stop moving!"

"You hit my eye!"

"It's my eye, Becker, and I wouldn't have if you'd hold still."

"What the hell kind of torture do you girls put yourselves through?"

Jess giggled. "Aren't you more appreciative, now?"

"No."

She giggled as she finished her eyes, then did her cheeks and lips.

"This is humiliating," complained Becker.

"Thank you for letting me to do this."

"Only you, Jessica, and if you tell anyone I let you, I will kill you."

"Me? Really?"

He raised her eyebrow. "Maybe not kill," he said.

She smiled. "Now I'll just fix my hair. I think a simple ponytail."

Becker rolled her eyes. He tried to remain calm as she blew her hair dry and fashioned it.

"Good. Done!" Jess cried happily.

"Thank God!" he cried, scrambling to get away from his torturer.

"Don't you want to look in the mirror?"

"No, Jessica. I'd rather have two black eyes, deep scratches, and big purple bruises on my face, then even think about wearing makeup."

She giggled. "It's actually me, wearing the makeup."

"I'm in here for the time being." He grumbled. "That was truly horrifying. Let's get to the ARC and switch back."

"OK. My turn," said Jess. "Or you. Whatever."

Becker picked up the black uniform.

"Do I have to wear that?"

"Yes, Jess, but I suppose we could stop by my place."

"What are the odds you'd dress me in something colorful there?"

He smirked. "Not great, then, you'd have to change into this at the ARC anyway."

She frowned. "Fine." She closed his eyes, and held his arms out. "Dress me."

It was so funny. She looked so like Jess, only in a 6 foot tall, rugged body.

"OK, here we go," he said. He pulled his trousers on first.

Jess giggled. "You're tickling me."

"I am not."

"Well, I'm giggling," she said, as he gently pulled the pants up his legs. She giggled more. "Your body's ticklish!"

"It is not!"

She giggled more.

"Jess, if you don't stop..."

"What are you going to do, tickle me?"

Becker shook her head, as the tall form in front of him giggled and squirmed in a very unmanly manner. Then he pulled his shirt over his head and down his body.

She giggled. "It's still tickling me! Oh, you're in so much trouble! Now that I know how ticklish you are, boy are you going to get it when we change back!"

"I am not ticklish, Jessica. I am a Captain in the British military..."

She broke his sentence with girlish giggling coming out of that normally stoic face.

"Everyone at the ARC's going to think I've gone bonkers," he said, as Jess collapsed on her bed, giggling.

End of Chapter Two


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: This still is Teen, but the scene here gets...adult-ish. Let me know if you feel it's too much for a teen rating.

Chapter Three, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

They left Jess' room, to find Connor and Abby sitting at the kitchen table. They were holding hands, and nuzzling.

"Ew," said Becker, with Jess' light voice.

"You two look well," said Jess.

"We had an awesome night," said Abby, who was really Connor.

"Sh," said Abby, blushing Connor's cheeks.

"What? I'm a scientist. It was an experiment," said Connor.

"What was?"

"No, Jess, please, don't ask," said Becker, frowning Jess' normally cheerful features.

Connor and Abby both giggled. "Let's just say that last night, we both learned how the other half lives," said Connor.

Abby blushed.

"Huh?"

Connor smirked evilly.

"Oh...my...God! You didn't, did you?" asked Becker, shocked and disgusted.

"What?" asked Jess.

The other couple laughed and giggled.

"Gross!" cried Becker.

"Someone fill me in," begged Jess.

"No, maybe you shouldn't know," said Becker.

Abby laughed, and said, "We aren't what you'd call a conventional couple..."

"And we have been a couple for a long time," said Connor.

Becker 'ew'd again.

"It was the only chance to know what it was like," Connor continued.

"What? I don't get it," said Jess.

Abby laughed. "Haven't you ever wondered what it's like, you know, as a man?"

Jess stared, glancing from one person to the next. Then, it slowly dawned on her. "You two...you...oh my God!"

They laughed, Becker shaking his head.

"I think I like being a guy better," said Connor. "Though making love as a woman was enlightening."

Abby laughed. "It was."

Jess shuddered. "Yuck. How could you?"

"It was easy," said Connor.

"No! Don't give me details, please!" cried Jess.

Becker began chuckling, then cocked his head as he looked at Jess. Then his highbrow shot up.

"Don't look at me like that!" cried Jess.

Becker laughed. "It would be..."

"No! Besides, I'd prefer our first time to be as us, in our own bodies."

"Ew," said Connor.

"What? I thought you were comfortable talking about sex," said Becker.

"When it makes you guys squirm, sure," said Connor. "Not so fun, when it's me."

Abby laughed. "Are you two OK?"

"No! You grossed us out," said Jess.

Abby laughed more. "I meant, how did you two manage, in each other's bodies?"

Becker and Jess looked at each other. "Fine," he said.

"Yes, fine," said Jess.

Abby exchanged glances at Connor. "Really? You guys didn't..."

"No, we did not!" cried Jess.

Becker laughed. "It was interesting getting dressed, though."

Jess turned red, and her roommates noticed. "That good, huh?" asked Connor.

"Shut up!" cried Jess.

"That's enough picking on her," said Abby. "Sorry, Jess. Are you really alright?"

"Yes, thank you."

"How did you manage, then? I'm asking as a scientist, Abby." Connor said, when Abby nudged him.

"We...dressed our own selves," said Jess. "No big deal."

"But didn't you see?"

"No, Abby, we didn't!" cried Jess.

Becker put a protective arm around her, as best as he could in his shortened height. "I thought you were going to leave her alone," he said.

The other two smiled. "Right, sorry," said Abby.

Jess nodded. "I'm just a bit weirded out."

"Understood," said Abby. "Come on, let's get going."

Abby headed for their room. Connor ran after her. "I want to dress me! I mean you! It sounds fun. Was it fun, guys?"

Jess covered Becker's face with his hands. "I'm so embarrassed."

"Don't be. We're all in the same strange boat," said Becker. He held her. "It's going to be OK."

She nodded. "It's just...my life keeps getting weirder."

Becker laughed. "Yeah, that happens if you're employed by the ARC."

They made toast and tea, and sat down to eat, while Connor and Abby got ready. Finally, Connor came out, wearing blue, ankle-high, combat boots; leggings; a purple and black checked, knee-length skirt, and a blue long sleeve shirt with a black concert tee over it.

"I totally rock this look," he said, posing with Abby's hands on her hips.

"Abby made you wear a skirt?" asked Jess.

"No, I did not," said Abby, coming out in simple jeans, a Sherlock Holmes t shirt, and denim jacket. "He picked that outfit."

Connor jaunted around the kitchen, striking model poses. "Don't I look great?"

"No. Abby looks great," said Becker. "You're just strange."

Connor smirked. "You look great too, Becker. Those colors really work for you."

"Stow it, Temple."

"I wouldn't tease him," warned Jess.

"I was complimenting him! By the way, I love that skirt," said Connor, trying to get an angle to see up it. Becker pushed him away, and not too gently.

"Connor, stop teasing Becker about Jess' clothes," said Abby.

"Fine," said Connor. "I will."

"Can we please go?" asked Becker, frustrated.

The girls nodded, and they walked out of the flat.

"Love the smoky eyes and pink lips, Action Man."

Smack!

"Ow! He hit me! I mean, she hit me!"

"Connor, stop it!" cried Abby.

"Me? He's the violent one!"

"You kind of deserved it, Conn. Now, get in the car," said Abby.

Abby drove, Connor sitting beside her. As Jess crawled in the back seat with Becker, she said, "You don't have to look so smug."

Becker just smiled.

End of Chapter Three


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: This has different original characters than my usual stories, since I didn't know how they'd end up at the time I wrote it. I didn't want to maybe kill my usual supporting characters, I love them too much. Doesn't mean these are dead though. Read and see…

Chapter Four, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

They exited the car at the ARC. Becker envied Connor, wearing Abby's combat boots. He was having a nightmarish time walking.

"Straight, Becker. You're walking like you're drunk."

"Jess, I can't help it. Did I have to wear heels?"

She giggled. "I got you one of my shortest pairs, Becker."

He wobbled in her body, trying to control her feet. "This is hopeless."

She laughed. "You'll get the hang of it."

"I don't want to, Jess. This is embarrassing. It's embarrassing to be you."

She took Becker's hands off supporting her body for a second, to put them on his hips, like she usually did when she was upset.

"It is not!"

Becker, in Jess' body, fell forward, nearly landing on her face, but 'Connor' caught her.

"Whoa," said Abby, "Easy there Jess."

"I hate this," whispered Becker.

Abby laughed.

"Maybe we should have practiced," said Jess. They approached the first checkpoint. "Hi, Stanley," Jess said cheerfully.

Becker glared at her.

"Um...good morning, Captain," said the startled sentry. "How are you all today?"

"We're fine," said Jess. "It's a lovely morning. I hope it stays warm this after..."

Becker pulled her suddenly away.

"Excuse you!" she cried to him.

"Jess!" he quietly scolded. "Do not make nice small talk with my men."

"Why? I always do."

"Yeah, you, Jess Parker do. Captain Becker doesn't," he answered.

"Oh," she said.

"And I only call them by their last names or ranks."

"Right. Sorry, I forgot."

He rolled her eyes.

"Calm down, Becker. No harm done," said Abby. "We aren't trying to infiltrate them or anything."

Becker sighed. "Right. I know. I just...don't want them thinking I've gone soft."

"No worries, there, Mate. Once we're back in our right bodies, you can scare the hell out of them again, just like normal."

"Thanks, Connor," said Becker sincerely, making the other three laugh.

They made it to the locker rooms with no problem, and then to Ops.

"How do we play this?" asked Jess.

Becker shook his head.

"Your men took the switch between you and Connor OK," said Abby. "Just tell them."

"No."

"Why not?" asked Jess.

Becker sighed, and shrugged her shoulders. "I...It's...they'll never forget it."

Abby and Connor chuckled.

"I guess they would tease you, a bit," said Jess.

"A bit? Try mercilessly, Jess," said Becker.

Jess giggled. "You can handle it, big boy," she said, walking up and kissing him.

"Jess? You may want to change your walk," said Connor, laughing.

"My walk?"

"Yeah, you um...wiggle."

Becker nearly exploded. "Connor!"

"I'm just trying to protect you, Action Man! If you don't mind people getting a good look at Captain Becker swaying his hips as he walks, then never mind. Frankly, I don't need to see it."

Abby burst out laughing. "Good point. Connor, you're lucky. I don't walk like a lady."

He nodded. "It's sexy enough for me, Abs."

Becker was bright red, trying not to freak. Jess, lightly pink, chuckled. "Sorry, I didn't realize. I'll try to walk more butch."

He calmed down as she smiled at him. "OK. I know it's not your fault."

She smiled, and kissed him again.

When Matt and Emily walked into Ops, they were greeted by an unusual sight: Captain Becker walking back and forth. "How's this?" he asked.

"More swagger," said Abby. "Use those shoulders. You're a big man, king of the hill, walk like you own the world."

Becker tried, but wasn't hitting his usual, manly stride. It came out like a duck waddle.

Jess, sitting nearby, held her head in her hands, groaning, while Connor sat on a desk watching the scene and laughing.

Matt raised his eyebrow. "Jess and Connor?" he asked the body of Jess Parker.

"Yeah, he's teaching her how to walk like a man," said Becker. "It's too bad he doesn't."

"Don't be mean," said Abby.

Matt laughed. "Becker, you OK?"

Becker shrugged Jess' shoulders. "Aside from realizing that I'll have no dignity left when this over, I'm fine."

"He's just being a big baby," called Jess. Then she smiled Becker's playful smirk. "I mean, a little baby."

Becker shook her head. "See if you can motivate Connor to switch us back, will you? He won't listen to me, and I'm having trouble looking menacing in this skirt."

Emily and Matt both laughed.

"I will motivate him," said Emily. She walked over, and grabbed Abby's ear. "Let us go to your lab, Connor."

"Watch it! You're stretching Abby's earlobe!"

"I'll take the hit for the team, Connor," said Abby, smiling as they left. She jumped off the desk. "I'm going to check the menagerie. Is it ok to let my senior staff in on our trouble?"

Matt nodded. "If they ask."

"Oh, they'll ask," said Abby, walking Connor's body out.

"I should get to monitoring," said Jess, sitting Becker's body down. "Oh, this is all wrong!" She got up to adjust her chair.

"Matt, tell Lt Turner he's in command for now. Try to leave out the fact that I'm in an adorable body wearing heels and a string of beads, will you?"

Matt chuckled, as Jess looked over at her own body, and blew it kisses.

Becker sighed. "I'm going to hide out here until further notice."

Matt nodded. "Understood," he said, leaving. "You look beautiful, by the way, Captain."

Becker sighed. "I hate my life."

Jess giggled. "I owe you, just think of all the ways I can make this up to you," said Jess.

Becker slowly smiled. "It isn't your fault, but you've got my imagination going," he said.

Jess laughed.

There was a commotion outside Ops, and Lt. Turner ran in. He stared at Jess' body.

"I guess he knows," said Jess, making Turner look to her, that is, Becker's body. She waved.

"Oh my God!" screamed the Lieutenant, trying not to smile. "It's true?"

Becker moaned. "Don't you have mission reports to do? How about busting in some now recruits?"

Lt. Turner began to laugh. "Sorry...Sir."

"You may want to keep in mind that I can turn these heels into lethal weapons."

Jess looked at Becker, with compassion. "It's not very easy on us, you know, Lt. How about some sensitivity?"

He smiled. "You are definitely Miss Parker," he said, staring at the body of his Captain. "Sensitivity. Right. I'll try."

He saluted Becker, and turned on his heel, marching back to security, chuckling.

"You didn't warn him to keep silent," said Jess.

"If he doesn't know to do that, then he's too dumb to be my second in command," said Becker.

"Good point," said Jess.

End of Chapter Four


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: There is some jumbled talk in this chapter as Connor tries to figure out what is causing the switching. I have an idea but it is vague and kind of lame. It will come in the next story. I intended this to be the last, but I have one more story in this series.

Chapter Five, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

Lester strolled into Ops, smiling and humming. "Isn't it a splendid day?"

Becker raised Jess' eyebrow. "Is it?"

"Yes, Miss Parker, it is. I'm having a splendid morning. Of course, last night was even better. Sorry for ignoring you lot, but the Mrs. and I were...catching up." He smirked.

"Yuck," said Becker.

"I think it's sweet," said Jess.

"Indeed, let's go with sweet," said Lester, strolling by them, heading to his office.

"He's gone," said Becker.

Jess giggled. "He's in love with his wife. It's wonderful."

"Jess, he walked right past us. He hasn't been told about the swap, right? So, why didn't he find it strange that 'Becker' is manning the ADD, while 'Miss Parker' sits nearby, moping?"

Jess wrinkled his brow. "You know, that's a good point. He didn't seem to notice, did he?"

"Nope."

Lester spent nearly an hour humming in his office. Then, he emerged. "Captain Becker? Why are you at the ADD, and did you tell me that I was sweet?"

Jess smiled. "I did, Sir."

Lester looked at a smirking Jess, watching 'Becker' at the ADD.

"What in blazes is going on?"

"Bout time you noticed something was wrong, Lester."

"Don't be belligerent with me Miss Park..." suddenly Lester got quiet. He rubbed his temples. "You aren't you, are you?"

Jess and Becker laughed. "Which 'you' were you addressing?" asked Jess.

"Oh, whichever. We need name tags, I swear. Will the real Captain Becker, in whatever body he is currently in, please stand up?"

Becker laughed, and stood in Jess' body. "Happy?"

Lester stood, staring. "Deliriously. So, Miss Parker is at the ADD?"

"Yep. Hi!" she said, waving Becker's arm enthusiastically.

"Jolly good. Carry on. Did you ever order more pain medicine, Parker?"

Jess giggled. "I did. I put them on your desk this morning. I thought you might need them."

Lester groaned, going back to his office, where he washed several pills down with scotch.

"He's going to kill himself," mumbled Jess.

"That was fun," said Becker.

"You're sick," said Jess, "and grumpy. Why don't you go shoot something?"

Jess' face perked up. "Good idea," he said, happily. He started for the exit, but stopped to kiss Jess on his head. "You're brilliant."

"I am," she said.

He began to leave.

"Walk slowly," she said, smiling. Then she frowned. "Never mind. It's not the same watching your butt when it's mine."

He laughed.

In Connor's lab, Matt had joined Connor and Emily.

"So, I think you were protected from switching because you had just been switched with Lester. Don't know why Emily wasn't affected," said Connor.

"Why does this keep happening?" asked Matt.

"I think it's the same fractured anomaly that keeps popping up. I think it's somehow connected to us. It just appears at the Opera House where you guys are? No, too much of a coincidence. I think it's following us."

"Really?"

"Don't know for sure. I'm wondering why it switches us with different people too. Right now, it's all guesses."

Matt nodded. "If you're right, and it's appearing where we are, maybe we shouldn't leave the ARC."

"That would seem to be the most prudent course of action," agreed Emily. "We do not want more people to be infected."

Connor made a small noise. "Infected. Emily, I think you may be on to something. What if the anomaly is sick and it affected us? What if we infect it back?"

"Huh?" asked Matt.

Connor ran about his lab excited. "Don't talk to me, let me think. Sorry, um...get out."

Matt laughed, and ushered Emily out of the lab. "Let's leave the genius at work."

"We should visit the others to make certain that they are alright," said Emily.

They found Jess in Ops. "Abby's OK. Some of the creatures seem to prefer Abby's body to Connor's but they're beginning to adjust. Her staff is taking the swap in stride."

"That is encouraging to hear," said Emily.

Matt nodded. "Where's Becker?"

Jess laughed. "De-stressing."

"The firing range?" asked Matt.

"Yep. I must say, I'm getting quite the rep as an expert shot," said Jess, pulling up the firing range on screen.

Becker, as Jess, stood in front of a small group of awe-struck soldiers, all marveling at the petite woman's accuracy and speed.

Matt laughed. "That should make them respect you a little more."

Jess giggled. "So long as he doesn't take anyone on in hand to hand combat, I can live with it."

Matt smirked. "Jess, he isn't going to let anyone wrestle your body. Trust me."

Jess laughed. "True. Good."

Jess watched Becker unload another clip. Then, she switched off him. "I suppose I should get back to monitoring."

"Yeah. I think Connor's on to a way to switch you guys back, and end the body swapping for good."

"Hallelujah," said Jess.

Matt smiled. "Of course, I'm a little disappointed that I didn't switch with Emily."

"What?" cried Jess. "Are you insane?"

Emily blushed. "He is wicked, Jess, but not mad," she said.

Jess looked puzzled.

"Connor was just telling us about an experiment he and Abby did last night that sounded interesting."

Jess turned red, and clapped Becker's hands over his ears. "No! I can't hear you! La la la!"

Matt smirked.

"You are wicked," said Emily.

Becker returned from the firing range relaxed and happy. He sank into a chair near the ADD.

"Better?" asked Jess.

He smiled. "Much."

She giggled. "Only you would need firearms to relax."

He shrugged. "Don't be surprised if a few of the new privates look at you with awe," he said.

"Yeah, I saw on the monitors. I hope I don't have a fan club now."

"I think you do, but a slightly fearful one."

"You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

He smiled. "Maybe..."

She laughed. "You're jealous. I get it. I like it actually."

He laughed. "Heard anything from the boy wonder?"

"Yes. Matt thinks he's got an idea, and he's locked himself in his lab."

"Good sign. Hopefully we'll be back in our rightful bodies," he said, then he smirked. "Then maybe we can...explore."

She raised his eyebrow "Explore?"

"Yeah. Each other."

She turned pink and began to giggle nervously. "Captain, shame on you."

"Oh. Is that a 'no?"

She smiled. "No, that's not a 'no' at all. It's a 'you're dirty but I like it."

"All that in one word?"

"Oh, hush," she said, still blushing and smiling.

He laughed at her squirmy reaction. "Connor better hurry or we'll run out of cold water."

"I know!" cried Jess. "You should stop making me...happy."

He laughed. "OK. I'll go make some rounds."

"Really? In my body? I'm proud of you."

"I'll be discreet. Besides, the time at the range refreshed my killer instinct. Connor was right. I am a big man, so to speak."

Jess giggled, as the big man in a small, colorful body left to do his rounds.

End of Chapter Five


	6. Chapter 6

Author's note: This Chapter has a set-up for a lame attempt at explaining why they're swapping. I'm also setting up the next body swap story. I got an idea and request from RextheCoelurosauruvus that was similar to an idea I had, so I'm setting up for that too.

Chapter Six, Conclusion, Body Swap: Girls and Boys

Connor led Emily and Matt into his lab. Well, he tried to. His lab was locked. Connor sighed. "Hold on guys."

Matt smirked. "Forget the code again?"

"No. I didn't...It's not working.

A lab assistant came walking up. He was a tall, skinny man who wore way too much gel on his hair, and the ugliest pair of old grandma glasses known to man. He gave nerdy scientists a bad name.

"Hi Poindexter."

"It's Pointexler, Miss Maitland," corrected the irritated man. "I've told you. You are not cleared for this lab, Miss."

Connor sighed. "And I told you, I am. Butt out."

"Abby', that is rude,'" said Emily.

Pointexler turned his weasel-like face to her. "I don't need any help, ma'am," he said, saying ma'am like a curse word.

Emily looked aghast at Matt. "Pointexler, I'm okaying it," said Matt.

"I'm sorry, but you are not authorized, Sir."

Matt raised his eyebrow. "I'm close enough, open the door."

"It's fine Matt," said Connor with Abby's voice.

Pointexler smiled, thinking he had won. Connor smirked, and pushed open his lab door.

"How did you do that?" Pointexler asked in exasperation.

Connor just smiled as he ushered Matt and Emily inside. "I really don't like him," said Connor.

"Why? He's charming," said Matt.

They laughed.

"He thinks he's smarter than he really is," said Connor, shutting the door as Pointexler yelled something about security.

Connor said, "So, Emily got me thinking when she said we didn't want to infect anyone else with this body-swapping. What if the anomaly is sick?"

"Come again?" asked Matt.

"Just hear me out. This anomaly appears near us, and switches our bodies. We think we've fixed the situation once we get back, but it happens again. So, what if each time it switches us, including when it switches us back, it gets more unstable, more infected."

Matt frowned. "Where are you going with this?"

Connor blushed. "Oh. Yeah. I don't know."

Matt and Emily sighed.

"Sorry. I don't. I guess I just have to keep tabs on this anomaly, on its signature and try to figure out how to stabilize it."

Emily spoke up. "Connor, I believe you have 'gone somewhere' with your theory. We have been trying to fix our situation, not the anomaly."

"Yeah," said Connor. Then he smiled. "I guess I have got something. We fix the anomaly."

"How?"

"Jeez, Matt! One stroke of genius at a time!" cried Connor.

Behind the lab's windows, an irate Pointexler was mouthing off to Jess Parker, when the petite young woman suddenly jumped up and caught him in a headlock. Pointexler turned purple. Jess released him, he then slithered away.

Jess looked up to see Connor and company looking at her, and she smiled. She then stumbled away on her heels.

Matt chuckled. "What was I saying? Oh yeah. Are we going to keep switching?"

Connor shook his head. "I don't know."

"Great."

In the Menagerie, it became clear that all the ARC residents had to adjust to the swapping.

"Easy, girl. It's OK, it's just me," said Abby to the dracorex. "I know. I look, sound, and smell like Connor. It's me, though, Abby. I promise."

The dracorex stayed in the back of its pen, growling uneasily. Abby sighed. "Ben, you better feed her."

Ben smiled, and took the necessary precautions, then fed their dinosaur. "She doesn't seem to like Connor," he said.

Abby chuckled. "Connor is no Doctor Doolittle."

"No, he's more like Spock."

Abby laughed and nodded, as a green blimp flew in.

"Hey Rex," said Abby, holding out an arm. Rex flew down on landed on it. "You know it's me, don't you?"

"How?" asked Ben.

"Don't know for sure," admitted Abby, "but Rex is a pretty smart little guy,"

Rex cooed smugly.

Abby giggled. Sid and Nancy ran toward her, sniffing. "Hmm. You know something's up too. I smell like Connor, but I'm not quite him, huh?"

"I'm trying really hard not to make a joke," said Ben.

Abby laughed. "Most of the time my boyfriend smells good. He does get a bit obsessed, and I have to remind him of things like showering. And eating."

Ben chuckled. "Trials and tribulations of being a genius."

"I fought the temptation to spray myself with Jess' perfume this morning."

"That would have been funny. He'd have killed you, but it would have been a good joke."

Nancy ran her head along Abby as she bent Connor's body down to them. Sid seemed confused, but finally rubbed against her too.

"At least I'm not the only one who's confused by your new look," joked Ben.

Abby smiled Connor's easy grin. "Hopefully my obsessive genius boyfriend will fix it soon."

Rex, Nancy, and Sid squealed in agreement.

In Ops, Becker was also getting impatient.

"Becker, you're annoying me," said Jess, watching her body pace.

"When is Connor going to fix us? I've spent the whole day as you!"

"Excuse me, but I spend whole days as me all the time."

Becker wasn't laughing. "I can't take another day of watching my men go on missions without me."

"I'm sorry. My body isn't really trained for your work."

Becker sighed. "Grounded due to being small and adorable."

She looked over at him. He smirked. "Oh, good. That was a joke," she said, smirking.

He laughed. "I'm just so ready to be me."

"Me too. I have this chair set all the way to high, and your legs are still crammed under the ADD. You're a giant!"

"Miss Parker?" called Lester, walking from his office. "Would you please explain this complaint from this lab assistant named Poindexter?"

Jess looked at Becker, who smiled. She rolled his eyes. "What did he make me do?"

"Oh, nothing much. Just got the man in a choke hold and apparently terrified him. He wants to make a formal complaint."

"Becker? This could go on my record!"

"Please. Who's going to believe him, Jess? You're much too small to have done it."

"You did."

Becker smiled. "Yeah, but I'm trained to improvise."

Lester sighed. "Granted the man is a pest, and I'm sure he deserved it, but I don't need an additional headache now. Please, don't assault anyone else."

"Especially with my body!" cried Jess.

Becker laughed. "I won't. I promise."

"Um...so what about Poindexter?" asked Jess.

"As the Captain says, no one will believe his story. Unless you can put someone in a headlock, can you?"

"No!"

"Then don't worry about it, Miss Parker. It will go away," said Lester.

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it. Captain Becker, however, owes me one."

Becker smiled and nodded. "Thanks."

Lester nodded. "Excuse me; I'm off to visit the minister."

Just after Lester left, the ADD made a noise. "What is that?" asked Becker.

"We've rigged the ADD to make different noises according to the strength of the anomalies detected. Connor's got the ADD revved up to scan even the smallest, most unstable anomalies."

"And that sound means?"

"A weak anomaly is trying to form. Becker, it's here, in Ops."

"I don't see anything."

"That's how unstable it is. I'm notifying Connor."

"And the rest of the team," said Becker.

"Yes."

Becker looked around as Jess kept her eyes on the monitors. She suddenly saw a reflecting glow. "Becker..."

"Yeah, I see it. It's behind us."

Jess turned around. The anomaly was barely glowing. Matt, Emily, Abby and Connor ran in.

"Whoa," said Connor. "Okay, I need to get these readings. There's something going on with this thing."

"It is getting stronger," said Emily.

Connor walked closer, and it glowed bigger. "I got an idea. Becker, come here."

Becker moved closer. "What?"

"It's even stronger," said Jess.

"We're affecting it," said Connor.

The anomaly grew bigger and brighter. Then a tremor.

"Back!" yelled Matt.

They all moved back, Abby slightly behind the rest, when there was a flash, and they were all knocked down.

Becker was the first to wake up. His first sensation was that his feet were not killing him. He began to laugh.

"What's so funny?" asked Connor, sitting up.

Becker smiled. "Connor?"

He nodded. "Becker?"

Becker nodded back and smiled, he then turned to Jess, who was still out.

She woke up to see the most handsome face she'd ever seen hovering over her.

"Hey. I'm back. How about you?" Becker asked.

"Well, let's see...I hate orange chocolate, and insects. There is a certain gorgeous Captain I'm fond of, and if he doesn't kiss me soon..."

Becker shut her up by kissing her.

Connor lightly shook Abby. She opened her eyes. "Hey beautiful," he said. "You OK?"

Abby nodded. "I think so. Wait, who's body am I in?"

Connor smiled. "Yours."

Abby laughed, sat up, and hugged him. "Good."

"We all seem to be fine," said Matt, standing next to Emily.

"And where we should be," said Emily.

"Good," said Abby, "but is it over? I mean, are we done swapping?"

Connor shrugged. "Don't know."

"Let's just be glad we're us again," said Jess, straining up to kiss Becker. "I love being small."

Becker chuckled. "You're the perfect size."

The End, until the next body-swapping story. It is the last one-Body Swap: Now it Gets Really Weird.


End file.
